I’m Getting Better at Waking up Dead
The most important thing I do every morning is die.
To be frank, I suck at it. I like the illusion that I am controlling my life. I like chasing what I want. I like doing things for myself. The problem is — that is not the life I really want.
The life I want only comes when I wake up every morning and die to my own plans, dreams, desires, loves, and goals. The life I want comes when, every morning, I wrest “control of my life” from my hands and give it over to His.
“For the Son of Man” is the banner I have started to live under. If you don’t know what that means, read this. I must wake up and remind myself why I should get out of bed: “For the Son of Man.” I must persuade myself to get up and work. Why do I do it? “For the Son of Man.” Whenever I find myself doing things that I shouldn’t be doing, I must correct myself with the reminder: “For the Son of Man.”
If my deepest motivation is to live “For the Son of Man,” then I must keep coming back to it, reminding myself of it, because I forget it every minute. Why am I writing? For the Son of Man. Why am I going to New York this weekend? For the Son of Man. Why am I learning to be a better coach? For the Son of Man. Why am I living, moving, doing anything? For the Son of Man.
Living for someone else, or more to the point, letting someone else live through you, requires a death to self. Dying so that the Son of Man can live in me and live through me is essential, so every morning and every moment, I need to die before I can truly live.
